...And back to square 1

Yesterday was NOT a good day for my little challenge! I tried to get on the computer so I could vent about it, but it was just that bad that I didn't get enough time to do that!!
Gabe pushed EVERY button he knew to push to get me to yell... it worked! I found that after I yelled the first time (more of a scared yell because he JUMPED on McKenzie Grace) I felt bad. I apologized to him and asked him to forgive me and of course he looked at me weird and said "Yes, Ma'am..." This melted my heart... but then the little "angel" tormented me over and over!! He kept jumping at McKenzie Grace, which of course got her worked up and believe me, she is a drama queen already and does not need his help! Neither kids would nap yesterday and I really needed those few minutes of quiet time... yeah, didn't happen. McKenzie Grace cried if I ever left her sight and Gabe would destroy any and everything.
Last night was Cubbies for Gabe (which I need to get him to say his verse on video so I can share it with you all) and Seth and I are going to take turns keeping McKenzie Grace or helping in Sparks (they don't have nursery) and I told Seth that I was not going to be keeping 23 five and six year olds... I would not survive ... or they wouldn't = P
Needless to say, yesterday was no good, but today we have started out decent. Gabe has thrown quite a fit about a color of a bowl, but I didn't raise my voice and calmly dealt with him. I showed mercy by giving no spanking (Angela Thomas would be proud!) but giving him a good talking too!
So maybe we aren't back to square one because it doesn't seem as hard to not yell and I do feel bad right after, if not when, I am doing it.

I will post Gabe's Week 2 Cubbies verse today and possibly some pics- right now Gabe is wanting a book read and McKenzie Grace is wanting to eat (as always!!)

So far, so good

I have gone 2 DAYS without screaming at my children! (Does Mac count... ? If so, then that isn't true!) I am honestly surprised! It has been difficult and again to be honest, I have wanted to "beat" (have to put that in " " because you know I don't beat my children, but some people may take this literally if reading) them since I have no outlet of screaming! I have to leave the room and BREATH and come back. I don't think Gabe likes this way- he gets talked to and then spanked! I really can see his little wheels turning thinking he got away with something and then I lay him over my knee, kicking and screaming, and give him the much deserved spanking! I do feel better while he is getting his spanking because I am calm AND I feel like he knows the reason he is getting this spanking- since we talk about it and I make him look me in the eye and tell me what he did wrong.

Bible study has been great! McKenzie Grace is not really behaving... she cries most of the time... I don't remember if Gabe put up a fight this long with the separation anxiety, but I think she is more of a Momma's girl than he was a Momma's boy.
I have a smaller table that we are sitting at this time and Jessica and Heather are the only ones from my previous studies that I know. I like that we have a smaller group because we all get our chance to speak, but I miss all the laughs we all had in our big group! We have decided to try and go out to eat at Chikfila or someone's house afterwards on days that we can. Today we went to Chik-fil-a and McKenzie Grace ate just as much, if not more, than Gabe! It didn't surprise me really because she has been doing it, but I think it shocked others! She had 2 chicken nuggets and fries and her juice AFTER she had 2 jars of baby food at bible study nursery!! She is my little eater! (and not a picky eater either!) If I am eating it then she wants it!

Well, I hope everyone is having a nice week- here's to the rest of it!

One week... shouldn't be THAT hard...

I was doing my quiet time over the weekend and it was on mercy. I am so very thankful for the mercy that God has shown me over and over and over again! The study was trying to get me to see all the aspects in my life that I have been shown mercy from others and how I can show mercy to others. She pointed out that most mothers show mercy to others on many issues, but to their children... well not so much. That is me!! I was talking with Seth about this last night and he pointed out the only problem that I had with it- I don't need to let them "get off" with too many issues because they are learning right from wrong and that what Momma says goes... but I thought I could change my way off dealing. I am so comfortable that I will BLOW UP without even thinking! I'm actually surprised often at how much I yell at the kids and usually just to try and get my point across, but does that really work?! Probably not. At this point (yes, already!) I'm wondering if even talking to Gabe is getting across! He is so hard-headed and will not even look at you even if you have his head in your hands!!
SO, my challenge for myself- to not yell at the children for a whole week. Shouldn't be that hard, right? Well, it is only 9:30 on Monday morning and I have had to hold back several times! I am amazed at how many times I have had to... really puts things into perspective!
Seth thinks that I'm setting too high of a goal! He believes I should strive for ONE day! Well, I'm going to prove him wrong- at least I'll make it to two!

This should be some really interesting blog posts this week!

Cubbies

Tonight was Gabe's first Awana Cubbies meeting at church. He did AMAZING! He knew his verse (see video) and he kept saying how much fun he had at Cubbies! He told us all about playing, running around in circles and playing "Red light, Green light". They must have really worn him out because he said that he was tired before we even got home! He fell fast asleep before I even got McKenzie Grace to bed! This NEVER happens! He wants to watch a movie and most times is still up even after that, but not tonight!
Seth and I are going to help out in Sparks (which is 5 and 6 year olds). We will probably take turns each week because they don't have nursery for McKenzie Grace. She did great tonight though. She wants to play with the older kids so much! Everyone commented on how happy she was- as long as she is with Momma or Daddy that is!
Here is the video of Gabe saying his verse. We are going to record each week his new verses

It is such a blessing to see Gabe learning and LOVING to learn God's Word.

"I'mmmm BAACK!!"

I have started reading a journal I was keeping when Gabe was McKenzie Grace's age and then remembered that I even had a blog at one point! I have spent way too much time today on here reading and  loved EVERY single post... so I just have to start back! I don't know when I will have time between my new job at Gymboree, kids, bible study, tonight starting Awana, trying to get my own business with Gold Canyon off and running and trying to clean (I say trying because this is my "blah" part of everyday!) I find so much other things I could do- and most just involve sitting in front of the tv or computer... bad! Bad, Merideth! But, I really want too! I have started putting a few things in the journal at night too.
I want to make this blog pretty! I want to make it enjoyable- and with my kids that is a no brainer! They are just so much fun! (and not to mention C-U-T-E!)

So, for today (or for the time being at least) I have spent too much time at the computer and Gabe is whining to me wanting "Purple Juice" and it's lunch time... Welcome back to "Our Life"!

PS. Let's come up with a better name for this blog! I am NOT creative at all... so what do you think???